Posted by: debstake | October 9, 2008

Happy Birthday to Rodney

Today is my husband’s 50th birthday. This post is a tribute to the man I fell in love with almost twenty-three years ago. We’ve been married for just over twenty-one years and outside of my father he has been the most influential man I have ever known. For all the good things my dad gave me it had made me rough around the edges and hard to deal with for most people. Rodney on the other hand has been the water that courses over those rough edges to smooth them and make me a little more of a pleasant human being to be around.

Rodney is your typical type “B” personality and I the typical type “A” personality. A definition of both can be found HERE. He’s like a duck that allows most stresses to role off his back. I on the other hand am a control freak and need to be on top of all personal situations.

Being a type B, one would think that their health would be good and relatively free of stress, and type A would be just the opposite. Not true where it concerns either of us. Rodney’s help began to take a downward turn five and a half years ago when he was initially diagnosed with discoid (skin) lupus. A description of this disease can be found HERE. One month (33 days to be exact) after that (and what I believe is the result of the medication he was put on for the lupus) he was diagnosed with Grave disease. A description of this can be found HERE. Both of these are autoimmune issues and typically found in more women then men. Just this past summer he was also diagnosed with high-cholesterol.

In addition on Monday of this week he was admitted to our local teaching hospital for elevated blood pressure and after being kept over night for observation and testing he was also diagnosed with hypertension (high blood pressure). Some of Rodney’s issues are part environmental (i.e. diet) and part genetics. The auto-immune issues we have no idea where they came from. I think being around me has probably added to his stress level to some degree. Being a type B also means to me and in Rodney’s case a concealing of emotions. He allows people to manipulate him and he doesn’t say anything. It almost appears as though he doesn’t care. I know he does but he lets a lot more slide than I ever would. Obviously this is a very healthy way of doing things either. There must be a balance between A and B.

I love this man more than any other human being I have ever encountered (with the exception of my children of course) and it kills me to see him on so many pharma poisons to control issues that in part were probably triggered by the first pharma poison five and a half years ago. He’s down in the dumps right now because of all the medical issues and the aging but he will be fine and there for we will get through all this together. Just as we have every other “boulder in the road” that has come before this. It is what people who love each other are suppose to do. And I love him. 🙂



  1. Daniela,
    I am glad my words have offered you some comfort. Rodney was the same way, he had the lupus for about a year and half before even getting it diagnosed. However, once diagnosed he came right on board with the treatment options.

    A person can’t be forced into doing anything he/she doesn’t want to do. Try and tough it out and hopefully Dan will do what is best for Dan. The alternative really isn’t an option for most people.


  2. Your story is almost just like mine …my boyfriend Dan just got diagnosed with discoid lupus 4 months ago we are both 25 he does not let anything bother him and to me it also seems like he just doesn’t care which drives me crazy !!it kills me to see him in so much pain and him not admit it I just wanted to thank you for your story and that you say its a “boulder in the road” I needed that thank you and I hope you and your husband are doing well

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